No foolin', here comes the Fifth Third....

It's a $20 heart attack served up fresh at the local ballpark.

The Fifth Third Ballpark in Comstock Park, Mich., is putting the West Michigan Whitecaps on the map, but not for their class A ball playing. Instead all eyes are on the new Fifth Third Ballpark Burger. It would take more than one set of eyes to cover the surface area of this delectable treat.

The 4,800 calorie beefy entree includes five one-third pound beef patties, a cup of chili, five slices of American cheese, salsa, nacho cheese and a handful of Fritos (or Tostitos - it is uncertain at this time). For those folks eating rabbit food to watch their diet, that's included too - the burger is topped with lettuce, tomato and sour cream. (It is uncertain if light sour cream is available upon request). The tasty ingredients are all piled onto an eight inch sesame seed bun and can be sliced like a Chicago deep dish to serve four.

If a family of four could eat at a ball park for $20, sign up the Jones'. Keeping up with them after eating this may be more difficult, but that folks is a deal.

For the family with picky eaters or vegetarians don't worry. There are deep fried Twinkies on the menu too, and an assortment of ice cold Pepsi products to immediately adhere the fat to the sides of arteries.

The ballpark is prepared and aware that some crazies will surely flock to the stadium in order to try and conquer the big burger solo. For those folks paramedics will be standing by (thankfully all sporting events require a medical team on site).

For those folks who do conquer the big burger you walk away with a T-shirt, something big enough they can wrap around you when you body goes into shock waiting for the ambulance to drive across right field.

Surely a medical warning is printed on the back of the receipt at purchase.