Father's Day...

Every day is Father’s Day – or at least it should be. 

Think about all the things you have, and then take a moment to think about where they came from. Nine times out of 10 they came from dad’s wallet (or at least in my case). Dad doesn’t always provide just tangible things. Often times you’ll get things from dad you don’t even realize you’ve taken – until it’s too late and your sister looks at you and says, “Oh my God, that is so something Dad would do.”

I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. 

Always the philosopher, Dad inspired many a great thought – or an eye roll when he wasn’t looking – so I’ve decided to toss together a few classics. 

From the infamous "Halloween speech" to every class at BJHS - I don’t come to your house and mess with your stuff. Don’t come to my house and mess with mine. 

From the infamous "first day of fifth grade speech" - You are all heads of lettuce sitting on a Mexican dock. Some of you will make it to the Promised Land and some of you will rot. 

I have also heard he was famous for this line when he first started teaching boys P.E. (way back in the day) - Gentlemen, we have a problem

I was in third grade when I heard this gem. We even have a paddle with two holes drilled at the end named, Mr. Mule - To make a mule do what you want it to do, sometimes you just gotta whap it between the eyes

Referring to folks that "weren't to bright" - He couldn’t poor piss out of a boot, with instructions on the heel

Learning about consequences -  If you’re going to dance, you have to pay the band

About sweating the little things - It's not going to make the world stop turning.

I was about nine when I learned all about government as we sat in the basement with Mario paused - for three hours - Do you pay taxes? No? Well, just wait till you do and then you’ll understand why I’m pissed

Another three hour lecture, but this time it was about my grades - You, my dear, have missed the boat – actually you’ve got one hand on the boat while your sister paddles to beat hell around you.

On the farm when things didn't always go his way -  That’s life. That’s ag. That’s ag life.There is also It is what it is.

When we would complain about someone or something he would simply say - Can you change it? No? Then don’t worry about it. It is what it is. OR Can you change it? Yes? Then change it.  

There was also this response when we said we just "had" to do something - Nobody haaaas to do anything

Working on the farm - It builds character

Try to have an argument with him and you'd get one of two -  You just wait, your dad may be the stupidest sonofabitch now, but once you get to college I'll be the smartest sonofabitch you know. (He was right). You might get Look, I have empathy, but no sympathy. 

When we were in high school we got this one - There is a time and place for everything, and it's college - where I don't know about it. 

And currently the profound -  You have to have wind to fly a kite 

A man of few words, he does tend to say the right thing – at the right time, because some of it has actual sunk in as scary as that may seem. 

Bottom line is I wouldn’t be who I am without all these words of wisdom.

 

 

-